Lost in Wonderland

05:33

It has been on hell of a ride, you know. Almost exactly two years ago, when I spent my last days of summer in my home town, around kids I grew up with, I couldn't even imagine what was going to happen.
Flashback to 2003, seven-year-old me with light blond hair, walking to school, squeezing my mum's hand, with my 4 year old brother on the other side. July 2012, graduation speech that made everyone laugh and tear up, my mum came all the way from England to be there. My 4 year old brother had just turned 12, my babybrother was 7. A year later, 2013. First day of september and I'm sitting in a classroom with people I've spent the last year with. Some of them I've known since I was a toddler, my best friends. They were just about to start 11th grade. And I was about to catch a plane.

9th of September. Oh, I remember this day well. 17 years old. Interiew at college. Managed to get lost at North road, which now seems quite stupid, because Constitution Hill and North road is practically home to me now. I was so scared. Excited, of course, but terrified. Everything was different, cars driving on the other side of the road, big city, buses with two floors and everyone around me speaking english. I was terrified, because you know, you can study a language only so much. I was introduced to Gareth, I didn't know it then but he was going to be my tutor for the next year. He was the first person I met in England. And he was brilliant, funny and caring. My mum did most of the talking, if I remember correctly. And I got my student card. And I was officially a student in Bournemouth and Poole college, studying dance.

My class was big, so many different people. I dont think I ever really fit in with them. At the time, I thought it was the language barrier. I froze when I had to speak, never really had anything to say and I guess I just didn't want to be mocked because of my accent. And I didn't really make friends with any of the dancers. It's easy to say it now, but I do wish I had tried harder. I met people in the performing arts students, though, some of them are still good friends of mine. I focused on dance. I focused on getting good grades. I had my ups and downs but always pulled through, a lot thanks to G, who was always there. And later Aj, Jane and Jo. I could have not asked for better teachers.
And I met some wonderful, talented dancers. I'm so proud to have met girls like Troi, Lydia, and of course, Holly. You guys should really see her dance. She kills it every time. I'm so proud of her. She inspires me, she inspired me the whole time and she probably didn't even know it.

And now, two years later, I've finished my course with grades I am more than happy with. And I've grown, you know. I got an unconditional offer from University of East London, so 2016 will be my year. Until then, I'm gonna save up, keep an eye on flats in London and make my boyfriend happy. He's amazing by the way, my soulmate.







25 Things I learned before I turned 19


1. Remember where you came from, your past is what makes you who you are today.



2. Make friends with that Russian girl in your year. She'll make you laugh, take you on adventures and you'll always remember her.



3. Travel to places you've wanted to see, even when your friends think they're little and not really important in your tour. Go there anyway. You've got the time.



4. Be kind to your little brothers girlfriend. She's probably scared of you. Take care of her, you'll have more in common than you first thought and she'll be like a little sister to you.



5. Invite your best friend over when one of you is having a bad day. Bake as many cupcakes as you can. Then give them away for free. Believe me, it's worth it.



 6. When you meet someone, who doesn't leave you behind on your first day in a new place, stick with them. Go to McDonalds and promise to never order McDonald's again. Then go again next week. Make it a thing until going there alone feels wrong.



7. Book a holiday on the last minute. Get lost in cities you've never been to. Lose your best friend. You'll realise how important she is when you're running through strangers trying to find her. 



8. Take care of yourself, your body and mind. The first run is always the hardest.



9. See your favourite band live. Buy the tickets 3 days before and go with someone you hardly know. A year later you'll beat yourself up because going with a stranger could end badly. Never do it again.


 10. Visit a city. It might turn out to be pretty boring but you'll get a good laugh out of it. And good company.



11. It's okay to have a bad day or two. As long as you know you can get out of bed as soon as you want to.


12. Make friends with a girl named Holly. Make friends with her BEFORE you finish college. Get her balloons for her birthday.


13. Don't get stressed about universities. Do your research, go to open-days, apply for places you think you have no chance at.
Don't get stressed about auditions, either.


14. Cry when your younger brother graduates. Go through all the pictures from your childhood and be proud.


15. Spend time with your family. Try to see them at least twice a month.


16. Take your mother out, buy her coffee and cake, go shopping together. You'll learn to know her in different ways.


17. Help your baby brother bake cupcakes, decorate them together and send him to the neighbours house. 



18. Getting a polaroid camera will be the best thing that's ever happened to you. Even though you'll stop using it after a while and keep taking photos with your iPhone.




19. Always try your hardest. 



I've taken thousands of photos, so here's a fair share of them.

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